“Prayer
is passion that is quiet but inwardly intense – a lively immobility” (Benson
and Wirzba 55).
Prayer
found in the secret place, not in the cave in the mountains of Nepal, but in
the heart of the person, persists the shaking of boundaries, making mountains
low and valleys high of self-esteem in the essence of the person praying. Pouring
out his heart, affections, and desires to God, he becomes immobile by the
transformation of his heart in the light of his standing before the Holy. For
the holy man, prayer is the passion of his heart, a communication that is not
just a pastime, but a spiritual necessity to an earthly life. It is a deeper
and more zealous passion than those who shop on Black Friday to receive a
discount on an item that in probably five years they will throw out. Most times,
people think of passionate prayer in the form of petitions before the divine
asking fervently for things in their situation. However, many icons of the past
have put passionate prayer in the form of thanksgiving, praise, and worship.
Because, as one goes beyond self and now concentrates on the divine, a threshold
can be crossed where the ferverence is no longer about you, but God. The
intentions and secret motives of the heart mean everything in the prayer
because it dictates the origin of desire and the destination of connection to
God. For the Pharisees in Jesus’ time, their motive for praying was based on
the religious customs and duties of the day, being teachers of the religion and
making themselves known as divinely designated spiritual people. They gained their
identity and satisfaction, not in their prayers being heard by God, but by the
amount and perception of the people around them. Furthermore, emotions, to
people, stir their prayers in certain ways. If one’s prayers are based on anger
and bitterness, whether to God or a person, that prayer or communication with
God will have a tendency to aggressive speech or a verbal attack with even an
inward accusation before God, “God if you could have stopped this, why didn’t
you!” While, on the flip side, one could pray based on fear making it a plea
for help in the midst of turmoil, similar to many of King David’s psalms. In
one, David cries out to God to take justice against his adversaries, asking for
death, and in another, it appears as if he cries for help and strength and
security. Nonetheless, God still meets David where he is with himself, his
emotions, and his situation, as God recognizes David’s humanity, but all the
while, metamorphosing his heart with the very prayers based on emotions and
situations trying to kill him. From my experience, in the end, the intensity is
not so much the prayer itself but the effect it has on our essence and how the
Holy responds, ultimately changing the core of who we are. Thus, prayer becomes
the catalyst for changing primitive human behavior into something holy in the
face of adversity or in the quietness of God’s presence.
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